Guest Column: How to hit on a girl, by a girl.

September 6, 2011 | kirin

 


If there’s a woman you like and there’s a more than slim and less than fat chance she could reciprocate, then what are you waiting for? Go get her!

 

 

Begin by catching her eye with your eye. It works great for people at all stages of court-hood, whether it’s the first sight at love or the happily ever for-after-or-for-worse. At the initial stage, a good sign that she’s enjoying the eye flirts (not to mention the eyebrows) is laughter and blushes. Tip: try to aim at getting these reactions from her side too.

 

 

Then when you get to the point where proximity allows your mouth to get into action, compliment the lady. Whether it’s her hair, the way she smells (i don’t mean BO, unless you have a fetish for that), her manicured hands, or her kohl-lined eyes. She’ll love it. Even if she accuses you of blatant flattery there’s no denying that ’most every woman likes some praising.

 

 

Now that there’s some regularity in your meet-ups, do her a favor – offer to carry her bag for her (assuming she trusts you by now not to take off with it). This includes shopping bags, back packs, lady bags and laptop bags. It serves as an indication of how strong you can be for her, literally. Also, she may need your hands to: open cans and bottle caps, light the fire, fix a leaking tap, insert her sim card, and pluck fruits, among other things. These little efforts that display your dexterity will definitely win you 25 brownie points (or cookies if you prefer).

 

 

As an occasional conversation filler, let her catch you glancing at certain parts of her body and act slightly dazed (you might not need to act if said body parts are fine). She may or may not say anything in response but your eyes would have succeeded in making her feel like a streetcar named desire. This comes with a warning though: not to be overdone, especially when you’re in stranger mode.

 

 

If she cooks dinner for you, eat it. Declining just might be translated as your rejection of her entirely. And (no if’s here) when she makes a mention of her being fat, always be sure to tell her she isn’t. A woman asking the question, ‘Am i fat/have i gained weight?’ isn’t asking for a complete analysis of how many centimetres and milligrams have been added since she last asked that question. She just wants some reassurance in the negative, so give it.

 

 

Another trick i like to use a lot is to modify clichés. “Baby, i’m in love with you…r ass,” is just one example. Also, try to keep mint at hand. Maintaining good breath, in my opinion, is a necessary requisite for action waiting to happen. Keep your tongue clean as well; it serves as a lethal weapon, if she’ll let you look for her sea-el-eye-tee.

 

 

When you’ve reached the stage where body contact is achieved and encouraged, offer her one of your best offerings yet. A massage. Be her masseuse and she’ll want to keep you close for a long, long time. (It worked for my parents and they’ve kept me for 21 years now.)

 

 

And, to *keep at it* throw in some surprises every now and then. Tell her she looks beautiful and follow it up with a gift. Buy her earrings. And if she’s Kirin, buy *HER* earrings!

 

 

-Nano (she likes her melons)

 

If you like what you read and want to read more, go here she’s got some really interesting things to say!

 

On a side note, here’s how to NOT hit on a girl