July 29, 2014 | kirin
We adopted Ozzie last year in August and every day I become more sure that while he was out there living on the streets, he was raised by a cat. WHY? Well…
He arches his back when he wakes up from a long nap like so –
He’s a bit of an asshole
He is very flexible
He tries to squeeze himself into very tight spots and sleeps quite comfortably and is a prize example of “if I fits I sits” only, edit the sits bit to SLEEPS.
His love for the Laptop
He waits for me to start work on my laptop before he attempts to SIT on it or me (whichever is more entertaining for him at the time) – I often find him sitting in FRONT of my laptop (when i am not in my room) with his paw on the mousepad/ keyboard – which leads me to believe that he has some diabolical plan to either kill me or take over the world…
His complete disregard for personal space:
It’s starts out cute and then get way creepy. It’s like how you think a guy is cute and he can’t stop looking at you because you are so damn mesmerizing and you are flattered and then after a point it goes into ok i am getting uncomfortable is he planning on all the ways he can kill me space.
You can see me getting a bit worried about the intensity of his stare…
Here he is channeling his inner Kejriwal….
He stalks me … LIKE PREY.
IT doesn’t HELP that he is BEIGE and blends in with the wall/floor
He does NOT like having a bath .. Or brushing his teeth
He has nine lives
We found him when he was slightly bigger than a medium sized hand and was trying to cross the road all on his lonesome and almost got run over by a truck. He escaped only with a slight limp. Since being adopted he has:
1.Chewed through electrical wires which were still plugged in
2.Destroyed not ONE but TWO of my fathers’ splenda sugar free capsule boxes AND eaten their contents and LIVED to tell the tale – He was a bit woozy that afternoon though…
3. Licks the walls of the house and then pretends he is staring at it when caught (though there is usually the incriminating evidence of a giant wet patch right next to his snout)
4. Ingested dyed beads and regurgitated them half an hour later – I think he was trying to create a masterpiece of his own along the lines of Millie Brown the Vomit artist
These particular cat behavioral observations aside though, there are times I think he is an alien and not really from this planet – I think Chewbacca is a much better name for him than ozzie is… he gurgles his greetings after I return from a long day out of the house and he chews.. EVERYTHING he can get his mouth on… but whatever he is I love him to bits and adopting him was one of the best things w ever did (much to the dismay of Sir Leopold.) and he’s made life a whole load more entertaining. Happy one year of being a Vas and here’s to many many many more years of your madness <3